Hello,
Below are a few conversation tin bits that I have had with many different Jordanians.
1) To call someone "cold blood" in arabic also can mean that you do not find the person sexy or attractive. My host mom uses this phrase when talking about Gerard Butler.
2)Most Jordanians do not eat many vegetables. Because vegetables are expensive, it has become part of the culture not to eat them. Jumana, a staff member at SIT, told me that she has to remember to force herself to seek out vegetables.
3) Muslim men can easily marry Christian women, but Christian women cannot marry Muslim Men. Seems paradoxical, but let me explain. The problems stems from the Christian community. The Christian community is very much a minority in Amman. As a result, Christians do not want their women marrying Muslims because they are afraid that they will convert or that the children will be Muslim and that it will make their minority even smaller. The issue has little to do with religious differences but more with demography. I have heard stories of Christians and Muslims dating undercover because they cannot get married.
4) It seems that Western people (from my experience Americans from SIT) feel that is possible for an Arab person to marry an American. My Arab friend feels differently. She stated that the cultural differences are too big and that one person would have to change how they do everything in order for the marriage to work. I find this idea interesting. I also wonder if Americans are more willing to go into a marriage with differences between the people in the couple because they know that they can get divorced rather easily and with relatively low to none social stigma. In the Middle East, divorce is hard and might take a while. As a result, people really, really, really think about differences and do not want to enter into a marriage with many of them. Americans, at least the younger generation, are more willing to give it a try. Love seems to be the base of American marriages while security and longevity seem to be more important in an Arab marriage. I'm not quiet sure I'm getting at this well...but I'm trying. I know of a girl who is trying to decided between two men to marry. One she loves while the other she is not attracted to, but he has a better job and will be able to support her. She is planning on ditching her boyfriend because the other guy is more of the marrying kind. While this also occurs in the US, I believe it happens more here. I feel like in the US, a couple can build their life together. In Jordan, a man is supposed to be established and the woman kind of adds to the picture, but is not the main supporter. A man must have a lot of money to be able to afford to marry here as well, so that kind of makes sense.
5) Marriage here is a contract...literally. A woman can put in where she wants to live, what type of house she will have and that she wants to finish her education. If these things are not met, she can get divorced quiet easily. A man can write things in as well. Both parties agree. I kind of like this idea. "On Wednesday at 9pm, Natalie will get to hold the remote for an hour to watch Real Housewives of New Jersey. The groom may not speak during this hour" (I'm joking of course, but its still a cool idea).
6) Technology has created a better dating scene in Jordan. People can check each other out on Facebook and send text messages. Secret romances are common and pretty funny to Americans. A lot of young people will stay up late talking on the phone to their "boyfriend". It seems unclear as to what the term "boyfriend" means. I have a feeling it is more of a friendship than anything sexual in some cases, but in others it seems to be the same relationship that people in America would have. Since virginity is a must here, I don't expect people to just be having casual sex. It would ruin them later. Since it is secretive, it is hard to find out a lot of information. Everyone in my program wants to know.
7) A tiny bottle of Saudi Arabian perfume costs 1000JD, but a drop of it will last you 1000 days (I'm joking).
8) A bottle of black label whiskey will cost you 90JD in Amman, but duty free 30JD. As a result, my host mom and her friend asked if I could take them duty free with my passport. I said sure, why the hell not. My mom's friend bought 2 bottles of whiskey and perfume. My mom bought Estee Lauder products and makeup. I think I saved them alot of money. They really appreciated it and took me to the mall for Hagen Daz ice cream. I had a huge cookies and cream one :).
9)Black dogs are bad omens, not black cats.
10) Handing someone a pair of opened siscors is an omen that will lead to bad luck between the two of you.
Til next time,
Natalie
Below are a few conversation tin bits that I have had with many different Jordanians.
1) To call someone "cold blood" in arabic also can mean that you do not find the person sexy or attractive. My host mom uses this phrase when talking about Gerard Butler.
2)Most Jordanians do not eat many vegetables. Because vegetables are expensive, it has become part of the culture not to eat them. Jumana, a staff member at SIT, told me that she has to remember to force herself to seek out vegetables.
3) Muslim men can easily marry Christian women, but Christian women cannot marry Muslim Men. Seems paradoxical, but let me explain. The problems stems from the Christian community. The Christian community is very much a minority in Amman. As a result, Christians do not want their women marrying Muslims because they are afraid that they will convert or that the children will be Muslim and that it will make their minority even smaller. The issue has little to do with religious differences but more with demography. I have heard stories of Christians and Muslims dating undercover because they cannot get married.
4) It seems that Western people (from my experience Americans from SIT) feel that is possible for an Arab person to marry an American. My Arab friend feels differently. She stated that the cultural differences are too big and that one person would have to change how they do everything in order for the marriage to work. I find this idea interesting. I also wonder if Americans are more willing to go into a marriage with differences between the people in the couple because they know that they can get divorced rather easily and with relatively low to none social stigma. In the Middle East, divorce is hard and might take a while. As a result, people really, really, really think about differences and do not want to enter into a marriage with many of them. Americans, at least the younger generation, are more willing to give it a try. Love seems to be the base of American marriages while security and longevity seem to be more important in an Arab marriage. I'm not quiet sure I'm getting at this well...but I'm trying. I know of a girl who is trying to decided between two men to marry. One she loves while the other she is not attracted to, but he has a better job and will be able to support her. She is planning on ditching her boyfriend because the other guy is more of the marrying kind. While this also occurs in the US, I believe it happens more here. I feel like in the US, a couple can build their life together. In Jordan, a man is supposed to be established and the woman kind of adds to the picture, but is not the main supporter. A man must have a lot of money to be able to afford to marry here as well, so that kind of makes sense.
5) Marriage here is a contract...literally. A woman can put in where she wants to live, what type of house she will have and that she wants to finish her education. If these things are not met, she can get divorced quiet easily. A man can write things in as well. Both parties agree. I kind of like this idea. "On Wednesday at 9pm, Natalie will get to hold the remote for an hour to watch Real Housewives of New Jersey. The groom may not speak during this hour" (I'm joking of course, but its still a cool idea).
6) Technology has created a better dating scene in Jordan. People can check each other out on Facebook and send text messages. Secret romances are common and pretty funny to Americans. A lot of young people will stay up late talking on the phone to their "boyfriend". It seems unclear as to what the term "boyfriend" means. I have a feeling it is more of a friendship than anything sexual in some cases, but in others it seems to be the same relationship that people in America would have. Since virginity is a must here, I don't expect people to just be having casual sex. It would ruin them later. Since it is secretive, it is hard to find out a lot of information. Everyone in my program wants to know.
7) A tiny bottle of Saudi Arabian perfume costs 1000JD, but a drop of it will last you 1000 days (I'm joking).
8) A bottle of black label whiskey will cost you 90JD in Amman, but duty free 30JD. As a result, my host mom and her friend asked if I could take them duty free with my passport. I said sure, why the hell not. My mom's friend bought 2 bottles of whiskey and perfume. My mom bought Estee Lauder products and makeup. I think I saved them alot of money. They really appreciated it and took me to the mall for Hagen Daz ice cream. I had a huge cookies and cream one :).
9)Black dogs are bad omens, not black cats.
10) Handing someone a pair of opened siscors is an omen that will lead to bad luck between the two of you.
Til next time,
Natalie
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